Don't yell/get angry, looking mature is crucial. Talk to him in a very serious&calm manner about ur ambitions, what u want in life. Tell him for an individual to have a healthy life, they should learn to stand on their own, because over-dependence to family bears dire results when the parents are gone and the child is left alone ("child" might be 52 btw!) Tell him as much as ur their child, ur also an adult who should be working on getting her life in shape. If he's not convinced, don't get mad, let him think about it. Keep up your mature behavior. Everyone has side that can be reasoned with. With dads, it's convincing him that u can take care of urself, assurence of ur love for ur family (meaning u'll never fall apart), and making him believe that you mean all those things so consistency is very important.
How do I stand up to my Dad and tell him I want to move out? I'm 21, feel trapped and I just want to live my own life now.
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Just tell your Dad the truth that you feel trapped and would like to just have your own space. I would recommend looking for a place near your parents' and go over to their house for dinner often. If your dad just still doesn't want to let you go, it's only because he cares for you and loves you and he wants you to be safe.
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I think you just have to bite the bullet and tell him. It won't be nice if he is as controlling as you said, but if you don't do it nothing will ever change and you'll be 30 in the same situation as now. You may want to consider getting an adequate amount of savings behind you, so if he did flip out you had some ready money for deposits etc. He may be your Dad, but its your life and if he wants to be part of it he needs to show some flexibility and consideration to you.
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Hiya, You are 21. You are an adult. If you have a job and a means to support yourself then I suggest that you save up enough money for a deposit on a flat/apartment, rent one out and then tell your father that you will be moving into said flat/apartment. If that seems a little extreme, then talk to him. Take him aside and tell him what you want to do. Don't let him undermine you. Don't forget that he will have his own agenda in wanting to keep you at home: Will he have nothing else to focus on if you leave? Do you do all the housework? Is he a control-freak? etc etc...You could try telling him that you would like it if he would flat-hunt with you. That way you can involve him. But be strong.
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You may be worrying unnecessarily he may feel it's time too.You should ensure him he won't get rid of you that easily & that you'll not be far away Tell him he'll enjoy the space of you not being there - keep it light hearted - remind him he's done a good job & you're ready to spread your wings & that you'll always be his daughter - you don't mention your Mum - she could help you if she's still with you. Remember when you're a parent not to make your kids feel like this xx
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